VIDEO: NYPD's "It Gets Better" for LGBT Youth

In light of today's Supreme Court discussion to consider whether or not to take on the same-sex marriage issue, i discovered this video featuring New York Police Department's Gay Officers Action League president; NYPD Commissioner Kelly; their LGBT community liaison and NYPD officers.

NEWS: National Marriage Equality Day is 7 August 2012

DISCLAIMER: Please note, venus kitagawa-stojsic, officiant and Life-Cycle Celebrant® of A Non-Denominational Ceremony,  fully endorses, supports, believes in, officiates ceremonies for and advocates LGBT causes and marriage equality but is not listed on the above website because its vendors must pay to advertise.

WEDDING: Ceremony Officiant at Ace Hotel in Palm Springs




Ace Hotel Wedding Officiant in Palm Springs, CA
Originally uploaded by dj venus on FLICKR.

 Congratulations, Heather and Erica!

The V.O.'s, as the gorgeous couple are known, celebrated in beautiful and classy style at the infamous Ace Hotel in Palm Springs, CA.


venus with the happy couple!

 The wedding was attended by a small group of dear friends and family, and took place in the Commune area of the hotel.

The desert chic setting was made complete with a black and white colour theme accented with lemon yellow (and lemonheads and lemonade!), perfect weather and true love.  It was a dream come true!

Photography by LILY RO (not these).

READING: Not Poetry, Not Literature, But a Unique, Objective Definition of Marriage

One of the most original and most special readings i have heard in a ceremony is something which was originally written and stated as part of a 2003 decision of the Massachusetts Supreme Court, holding that the Massachusetts Constitution prohibits denying same-sex couples access to the protections, benefits, and obligations of civil marriage.

Ceramic Doves from DJVenus on Flickr

The following definition of marriage was a fantastic thing to include in the ceremony text, and provides something different for those who think poetry is too corny or don't want to use the same old wedding ceremony readings:

"Marriage is a vital social institution. The exclusive commitment of two individuals to each other nurtures love and mutual support. Without question, civil marriage enhances the welfare of the community. It is a social institution of the highest importance. Civil  marriage anchors an ordered society by encouraging stable relationships over transient  ones. Marriage also bestows enormous private and social advantages on those who choose to marry. Civil marriage is at once a deeply personal commitment to another human being and a highly public celebration of the ideals of mutuality, companionship, intimacy, fidelity, and family. It is an association that promotes a way of life, not causes; a harmony in living, not political faiths; a bilateral loyalty, not commercial or social projects.

Because it fulfills yearnings for security, safe haven, and connection that express our common humanity, civil marriage is an esteemed institution and the decision whether and whom to marry is among life’s momentous acts of self-definition. Tangible as well as intangible benefits flow from marriage. The benefits accessible only by way of a marriage license are enormous, touching nearly every aspect of life and death.

It is undoubtedly for these concrete reasons, as well as for its intimately personal significance, that civil marriage has long been termed a civil right."

- by Chief Justice Margaret H. Marshall of the Massachusetts Supreme Court, from Goodridge v. Massachusetts Dept. of Public Health, 440 Mass. 309.

LGBT: Sheila Alexander-Reed Performed Skype Wedding in D.C.

Has anyone, not just an LGBT couple, been married via Skype in the U.S. before?

You may have heard about the Skype-officiated wedding ceremony of Mark Reed and Dante Walkup.  While the couple and their loved ones were in Texas, the officiant was in Washington, D.C. where all people, whether in same sex or breeder relationships, may legally be married.

The officiant SHEILA ALEXANDER-REID (also named "Shiela Reid-Alexander" in the wedding video) runs a lesbian-owned wedding officiant business with Deborah Thomas called MARRY ME IN D.C. 

"After serving the LGBT community for over 15 years, and working so hard for Marriage Equality in the District of Columbia, it only seems fitting that I would continue to serve my community through Marry Me in DC." 

Thank you, Sheila.  You are an inspiration to all of us! 

BTW see this article about Alexander-Reid which was printed in 2007 in the Metro Weekly, Washington, D.C.'s gay and lesbian news magazine. 

Own Your Equality and Use Technology - And as i continue to follow the developments of this story, i will try to research the legal aspects of the wedding ceremony and explore its ramifications.  Please stay tuned.

And CONGRATULATIONS, MARK AND DANTE!

ELEMENTS: Rainbow Roses are incredible natural, multi-colored flowers.

Rainbow Rose, originally uploaded by INTVGene.

i would LOVE to have these flowers at any ceremony, but i immediately thought about how perfect they would be for a same-sex / LGBT wedding!!!  Florists, take note...

Rainbow roses, also known as 'happy roses', who also create/sell rainbow mums, were developed and perfected in the world's flower mecca of Holland by inventor PETER VAN DE WERKEN.  You can order them from HAPPY ROSES and RAINBOW ROSE COMPANY.  The average price is about $90 for a half dozen, minus overnight shipping!!??

Wonder how they're made?  They start as cream-coloured roses, and differing accounts state they are introduced to different coloured dyes either via injection or via water.  See the video below!

If the above video doesn't work, go directly to the REUTERS link.

To cite the sources for the above: see Snopes.com, NY Daily News and the UK's Daily Mail...and apparently, there are imitation Happy Roses/Rainbow Roses, according to the Flowers Insolita blog.  i tried to find other links but couldn't...  but they're reportedly less expensive and not as vivid.  But beware, i also found ads for "rainbow roses" where you get a vase of several different single-coloured roses!

Huge thanks to Shawna Yamamoto Event Design's blog for turning me on to this gorgeous flower!!  i'm totally obsessed.

NEWS: LGBT Couples Must Wait a Few More Months to Marry in CA

The Ninth Circuit STAYS Judge Walker’s ruling; Appeal Scheduled Dec. 6th
#1: Same-sex couples will have to wait until at least December, to be married in California.  The 9th Circuit Court of Appeals granted the stay.
#2: The Court desires a quick resolution and they understand the importance of the case.  Therefore, Prop. 8 supporters’ opening brief is due in just a month and the hearing will happen on December 6th.
#3: The Court specifically orders Prop 8 proponents to show why this case should not be dismissed for lack of standing.



The decision, issued by a three-judge panel of the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals, overrides Judge Vaughn Walker's order to allow county clerks to begin issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples on Wednesday.

Supreme Court Justice Anthony Kennedy, who handles emergency motions in the West for the high court, may be consulted if Prop. 8 supporters successfully appeal.

Per Prop. 8 Trial Tracker

More info at REUTERS.

NEWS: Same Sex Marriage in California to Resume on Wednesday 18 Aug. 2010!!!

On August 18, 2010 at 5 PM PDT, defendants and all persons under their control or supervision shall cease to apply or enforce Proposition 8.

As stated on page three, line 10 of the final stay order issued today:

"As official proponents under California law, proponents organized the successful campaign for Proposition 8. Doc #708 at 58-59 (FF 13, 15). Nevertheless, California does not grant proponents the authority or the responsibility to enforce Proposition 8. "

 See a pdf of the entire final stay order as written by the Honorable Vaughn Walker, US District Chief Judge. You can also keep up to date with PROP 8 TRIAL TRACKER.

In other news, please see this powerful, logical argument in an interview on Fox News with Ted Olson, the former US Solicitor General:

NEWS: CA Same-Sex Marriage Still Not Allowed Until Stay for Pending Appeal Takes Effect

Regarding same-sex marriage, the Registrar-Recorder/County Clerk (RR/CC) of Los Angeles stated:

"...the RR/CC will comply with the orders of the court, and as such are unable to expand our services to same sex couples until entry of the final judgment."

What to do, now that Proposition 8 was overturned by the U.S. District Court?  Unfortunately, nothing, for  now.  A press release stating as such was issued by the City of Los Angeles on 4 August 2010, followed by a copy of the actual Order Granting the Stay.  Further info from the L.A. Times is here.

The Orange County Clerk-Recorder's office has not issued any statement as of noon 6 August 2010.

VIDEO: Thank you to Gilbert Baker, the gay Betsy Ross!

Have you ever wondered where the rainbow flag came from? This tv segment tells the story about the man and the circumstances behind what truly became a symbol representing the beauty and diversity of the LGBT community!

IN THE LIFE is one of my favourite television shows.  It's a fantastic show of documentary stories from the gay experience, which airs about once a month on public television.  Follow them on the Twitt'r here.

NEWS: Obama & Biden's Call for Congress to Repeal Defense of Marriage Act

"They are openly terrific!"

Watch Obama's remarks for LGBT Pride: "Because I believe that gay and lesbian couples deserve the same rights and responsiblities afforded to any married couple, I have called for Congress to repeal the so-called Defense of Marriage Act."

NEWS: California's Proposition 8 Closing Arguments - transcripts, tweets, briefs and more!

Today's Proposition 8 closing arguments from the California Supreme Court in Sacramento have been closed to cameras, but on the internet, there's a lot of information updating on a regular basis.

The AMERICAN FOUNDATION FOR EQUAL RIGHTS has a live ongoing transcript of today's Prop. 8 final arguments.  The organization will be posting an official, court-approved transcript later today.

As you may expect, there are live tweets from the courtroom:  @AmerEqualRights and @NCLRights .

The State of California's website has a throrough record of all Proposition 8 related legal documents, petitions, briefs and orders. 

Here's a peek at some HOMEWORK QUESTIONS the court provided the plaintiff and defendant to prepare for closing arguments.  According to the document itself,

"The court provides the following questions to the parties in advance of closing arguments. What follows is by no means an exhaustive list of questions, but is intended simply to assist the parties in focusing their closing arguments."

KQED's Scott Shafer has been on NPR, reporting about the end of testimony and the start of closing arguments.
KQED's Prop. 8 blogs may be found here.

Please share your live news!

NEWS: Maine Becomes 5th State to Allow Same-Sex Marriage

As we in California await the decision of the state's Supreme Court, Maine's state legislature approved a bill, which the governor promptly signed. Maine's Governor John Baldacci (D) simply stated:

"I have come to believe that this is a question of fairness and of equal
protection under the law and that a civil union is not equal to civil marriage."

We couldn't agree more!

BTW as the California Supreme Court considers legal arguments for overturning Prop 8, LGBT community centers, in partnership with Equality California and allied organizations throughout the state, are joining together to host a series of Town Hall meetings. The meetings will include updates from Prop 8 legal experts and open discussion on the future of the movement.
THIS Thursday, May 7, 2009 at 7 p.m., a Town Hall meeting will take place in Orange County at Santa Ana College Student Lounge, 1530 W 17th Street, Santa Ana.

NEWS: Attorney General Jerry Brown - on why "Proposition 8 Should Be Struck Down"

An excerpt from Jerry Brown's 3 March 09 piece via the Huffington Post:

"The (argument against Proposition 8) case touches the heart of our democracy and poses a profound question: can a bare majority of voters strip away an inalienable right through the initiative process? If so, what possible meaning does the word inalienable have?"

NEWS: Live Video of California Supreme Court Hearing on Proposition 8

The Supreme Court has announced that an oral argument will be held in the Prop. 8 cases tomorrow, Thursday, March 5, 2009 from 9:00 a.m. to 12:00 p.m.

The three cases being heard challenge the constitutionality of Proposition 8: Strauss v. Horton, S168047; Tyler v. State of California, S168066; City and County of San Francisco v. Horton, S168078 (the Supreme Court orders may be viewed here). In the cases before the court, the court has issued an order listing the following three issues to be briefed and argued:

1. Is Proposition 8 invalid because it constitutes a revision of, rather than an amendment to, the California Constitution?
2. Does Proposition 8 violate the separation of powers doctrine under the California Constitution?
3. If Proposition 8 is not unconstitutional, what is its effect, if any, on the marriages of same-sex couples performed before the adoption of Proposition 8?

The court will issue a written opinion in the cases within 90 days of oral argument. Proposition 8 was a statewide ballot initiative passed by a majority of California voters in November 2008.

To watch a live stream of the hearing, tune in to the CALIFORNIA CHANNEL or on SFGTV online. If you live in the Bay Area, you can also tune in to Comcast cable channel 78 and Astound cable channel 28.

For further information, please consult these websites:
California Courts official website
LAMDA Legal

NEWS: Attorney General Jerry Brown Decides to Oppose Prop. 8 in Court

According to the San Francisco Chronicle:

"...It is highly unusual for an attorney general to use the weight of his office to try to invalidate a voter-approved initiative. But Brown's 111-page filing with the California Supreme Court makes a compelling case that the measure's attempt to deprive same-sex couples of the right to marry conflicts with the state Constitution's underlying guarantees of individual liberty , which are ingrained in its very first sentences.

"My job is to see that the laws of the state are uniformly and adequately enforced, and that includes Article I of the Constitution," Brown said in a phone interview. As he noted, there is precedent for a state attorney general arguing against a voter-approved initiative that attempts to undercut civil rights: Proposition 14, passed by
voters in 1964, would have wiped out a fair-housing law. It was ultimately overturned in court."

NEWS: California Supreme Court Grants Review in Prop 8 Legal Challenges

This is an official email i received from Equality California:

Court to Determine Constitutionality of Prop 8

Today the California Supreme Court granted review in the legal challenges to Proposition 8, which passed by a narrow margin of 52 percent on November 4. In an order issued today, the Court agreed to hear the case and set an expedited briefing schedule. The Court also denied an immediate stay. On November 5, 2008, the National Center for Lesbian Rights, the American Civil Liberties Union, and Lambda Legal filed a lawsuit challenging the validity of Proposition 8 in the California Supreme Court on behalf of six couples and Equality California. The City of San Francisco, joined by the City of Los Angeles, the County of Los Angeles, and Santa Clara County, filed a similar challenge, as did a private attorney in Los Angeles. The lawsuits allege that, on its face, Proposition 8 is an improper revision rather than an amendment of the California Constitution because, in its very title, which was “Eliminates the right to marry for same-sex couples,” the initiative eliminated an existing right only for a targeted minority. If permitted to stand, Proposition 8 would be the first time an initiative has successfully been used to change the California Constitution to take way an existing right only for a particular group. Such a change would defeat the very purpose of a constitution and fundamentally alter the role of the courts in protecting minority rights. According to the California Constitution, such a serious revision of our state Constitution cannot be enacted through a simple majority vote, but must first be approved by two-thirds of the Legislature. Since the three lawsuits submitted on November 5, three other lawsuits challenging Proposition 8 have been filed. In a petition filed on November 14, 2008, leading African American, Latino, and Asian American groups argued that Proposition 8 threatens the equal protection rights of all Californians. On November 17, 2008, the California Council of Churches and other religious leaders and faith organizations representing millions of members statewide, also filed a petition asserting that Proposition 8 poses a severe threat to the guarantee of equal protection for all, and was not enacted through the constitutionally required process for such a dramatic change to the California Constitution. On the same day, prominent California women’s rights organizations filed a petition asking the Court to invalidate Proposition 8 because of its potentially disastrous implications for women and other groups that face discrimination. In May of 2008, the California Supreme Court held that barring same-sex couples from marriage violates the equal protection clause of the California Constitution and violates the fundamental right to marry. Proposition 8 would completely eliminate the right to marry only for same-sex couples. No other initiative has ever successfully changed the California Constitution to take away a right only from a targeted minority group. Over the past 100 years, the California Supreme Court has heard nine cases challenging either legislative enactments or initiatives as invalid revisions of the California Constitution. In three of those cases, the Court invalidated those measures.

You can get complete information regarding the actual case itself from the California courts website.

NEWS: Three lawsuits filed challenging Prop. 8

According to the Los Angeles Times today:

"The first action was filed by the ACLU, the National Center for Lesbian Rights and Lambda Legal. Santa Clara County and the cities of San Francisco and Los Angeles also sued, and Los Angeles lawyer Gloria Allred filed a third suit on behalf of a married lesbian couple....

"All the lawsuits cited the constitutional revision argument, and two of them asked the court to block Proposition 8 from taking effect while the legal cases were pending. "The court must hold that California may not issue licenses to non-gay couples because if it does it would be violating the equal protection clause," Allred said at a news conference.

"A California Supreme Court spokeswoman said the court would act "as quickly as possible" on the challenges.Other lawsuits could follow, but gay rights groups have called on supporters not to file cases in federal court. They fear that a loss at the U.S. Supreme Court could set back the marriage movement decades."

MORE INFORMATION in the news:
"Prop. 8 not retroactive, Attorney General Jerry Brown Says" from an SF Gate article dated 5 August 2008.

NEWS: If Proposition 8 Passes, What Happens to Same-Sex Couples Who Were Already Married?

Will Prop. 8 cancel out recent same-sex marriages? No one seems to know for sure. Until i get ahold of someone at the clerk-recorder's office or the registrar of the state of California, or an official statement is made, i will continue to compile information from different sources on this issue.

Bay Area newspaper SF Gate writes about the legal action being taken to block the measure, and possible repercussions if Prop. 8 does indeed pass.

Hear a story on NPR with UC Berkeley professor Jesse Choper about some possibilities that were discussed before the election.

Listen to another story on NPR discussing possible legal grounds and other directions from which to fight against Proposition 8.

That's it for now, i'll be updating frequently.

WEDDING: GLBT Ceremony in Foothill Ranch, CA

CONGRATULATIONS: Zach and Dave!

The best place to be wed is amongst your families and friends. This adorable couple tied the knot (see below) in the heart of Orange County, at a hotel in Foothill Ranch. When we met, i found out we had much in common, such as our love of friends and food!

Zach, who is a graduate of Harvard Divinity School (!!) and an ordained minister himself, gave me the tremendous honour of wearing his ministerial stole during the ceremony! Near the end of the ceremony, i bound Zach and Dave's hands together with the stole.