Friday, December 4, 2009

ELEMENTS: Acknowledge Family/Friends or Honour Deceased in Your Ceremony

i saw the following on POSTSECRET.COM this week:

My father, who I was very close to, passed away when I was 21 very suddenly and unexpectedly. 2 years later I met the man of my dreams and could not imagine getting married without my dad there.

To this day, whenever anyone asks me who walked me down the aisle the true and honest answer is: "My dad did".

Maybe someone else out there will find this to be a small comfort during the sadness of not having their dad.

My father passed away when i was fourteen, so not only do i empathise with this writer, i understand how important and meaningful it is, to acknowledge loved ones. Those unable to attend a (wedding) ceremony may still be made present! And, this can be done without bringing the mood down, taking the focus away from the celebration, or implying an afterlife. Consider these suggestions:
  • Use of a short verbal passage or introduction - to be read by the officiant or other participant.
  • Creating a symbol of the honoured person - through jewelry [see above], flower, dove release, candle lighting, balloon, ringing of a bell, etc.
  • Moment of silence - before proceeding with the main body of the ceremony, encourage a simple bowing of heads so believers may offer a prayer and non-believers can stop for a moment of reflection.

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