INTERACT: Map of Holiday Traditions Around the World

via ThingLink via educator Cathy Maher

VIDEO: Jason Collins Checks In to Nets vs. Lakers - 23 February 2014

It's not a big deal, it shouldn't be a big deal, but isn't it a big deal? The New Jersey Nets' Jason Collins is the first openly gay player (professional athlete in U.S. history from the "top 4 sports"?)to play in an NBA basketball game.

INFOGRAPHIC: Funeral Traditions of Hawaii

Funeral Traditions of Hawaii
Source: Valley of the Temples Memorial Park

VIDEO: Alternative to "Traditional" Best Man's Speech?

How does one simultaneously:

• Show off your music skills
• Dis your sibling for not possessing same said skills
• Avoid public speaking
• Send off aforementioned sibling on his wedding day?

This video is touted by the author to be yet another of "the favourite (ed. = best) things ever". Hiperbole aside, it may resonate for wedding guests and participants of a certain age. Funny thing is, the emotionlessness of the Kraftwerkian robot dummy was what they were going for...because, apparently:

We knew the hardest thing would be doing a traditional best man’s speech because we would cry too much.

At least, according to Gawker. Still, it took time, effort and caring to write and create such a production, so i know these guys love their bro. And what better thing to follow or precede or replace a wedding slideshow, than with this six-and-a-half-minute epic?!!  i think i would've taken the speech.

BTW at the time of this blog post, the video had had +350k YouTube views but the band/ensemble still only has 500 or so Facebook fans.

VENUE? D.C.-based LivingSocial Deals Site is Now Renting for Private Events

This week, tech blog VALLEYWAG  revealed there is a new private events space in Washington, D.C.  - the headquarters of LivingSocial. Like many companies with lots of space and not a lot of revenue (golf courses, historic buildings), LivingSocial wants to make some rent money by hosting your meeting, nuptials, memorial service or pop-up restaurant!

But, as Valleywag points out, just over a year ago the social deals site spent a lot of money and renovated the former National Union Insurance Company building.  At the time, LivingSocial supposedly stated their venue was not available for your wedding or some such:

"Want to hold your own amazing event at 918 F Street? Unfortunately, you can’t. The space isn’t available for private rentals – LivingSocial is committed to using the building for the greater good of all Washingtonians in need of good nightlife options. All events taking place at 918 F are open to the public via purchase of vouchers."

A good point made by a commenter: "Considering that weddings are often booked a year and more in advance, I wonder what the wisdom is of paying a hefty deposit to a company that may not be around in three to six months..."

EXPLAINER: What Do I Need to Get Married in California and How Do I Do It?

In California two people need a minimum of THREE things* to be married in a legally binding ceremony.

1) VOWS
2) MARRIAGE LICENSE
3) OFFICIANT

That's IT! This means you don't need rings or dowries or other gifts, nor do you need groomsmen, bridesmaids or cake. In fact, you don't even need to kiss!

The official site for California legislative information states that California Law consists of 29 codes, covering various subject areas, the State Constitution and Statutes. The subject area that marriage law falls under is known as the California Family Code.

Inclusive, modern LGBT wedding officiant. (Photo ©LilyRo)

California Family Code states "Marriage is a personal relation arising out of a civil contract...to which the consent of the parties capable of making that contract is necessary. Consent alone does not constitute marriage. Consent must be followed by the issuance of a license and solemnization..." (see California Family Code, Section 300. (a) ).

In other words -

What must you do or say at your wedding?
1) VOWS: There must be a couple, two individuals over the age of eighteen. The parties being married need to declare out loud that they take the other person as their husband or wife.

1) Vows.

What must you have or get to be married?
2) MARRIAGE LICENSE: You need to obtain a document that permits you to marry, also known as a marriage license. Most marriage licenses are obtained by the couple in person from a county clerk-recorder office. Some other qualified people and notaries can also issue marriage licenses.

*Please note, there are two different kinds of marriage licenses in California: PUBLIC and CONFIDENTIAL. Please see my previous post to learn the difference between a public and confidential marriage license in California. If you choose to get the public marriage license, you are required to have one, no more than two, witnesses over the age of 18. So, depending on the type of your marriage license, you may need 3 1/2 things to be married in California...

2) Marriage license.

Who is allowed to marry you?
3) OFFICIANT: In short, clergy people, judges, public government representatives, and deputized individuals are allowed to perform a legal marriage ceremony.

3) Qualified officiant. (Photo ©Tara Sielig)

 And, in case you don't believe it's that simple, these references are straight out of the CA Family Code website:

1) VOWS - "No particular form for the ceremony of marriage is required for solemnization of the marriage, but the parties shall declare, in the physical presence of the person solemnizing the marriage and necessary witnesses, that they take each other as husband and wife." (Section 420. (a) )

2) MARRIAGE LICENSE - "Before entering a marriage, or declaring a marriage... the parties shall first obtain a marriage license from a county clerk." (Section 350. (a) )

3) OFFICIANT - "Although marriage is a personal relation arising out of a civil, and not a religious, contract, a marriage may be solemnized by any of the following who is 18 years of age or older: A priest, minister, rabbi, or authorized person of any religious denomination." (Section 400 (a) )

It goes on to state that judges, justices, magistrates; retired judges, justices and magistrates; and " A legislator or constitutional officer of this state or a Member of Congress who represents a district within this state, while that person holds office" are also qualified to solemnize marriages.

SO...if you need help with your marriage vows, assistance getting a marriage license,  or want a qualified, trained, experienced person to officiate your ceremony, please contact A Non-Denominational Ceremony!  Thank you!!!

NEWS: “Average Wedding Cost” Figure is Grossly Misleading...

Remember the terms mean, median and mode from math class?

In Slate online magazine's 2013 wedding issue, writer Will Oremus lays out why the oft-quoted, oft-cited  'average wedding cost' figure should really be based off the median, or middle value, and not the mean, or average, amount spent.

Think about it: the higher the 'average', the more a couple will feel they're falling in line with other couples in their area...assuming they use other couples to compare their own weddings' costs. In the Slate piece, Oremus says quoting only the average makes sense in the interest of benefiting the wedding industry: "...If you’re in the wedding business, one big-spending couple can make more of an impact on your bottom line than 10 typical couples". Even The Knot's editor-in-chief insists “Couples (should) calculate their budget based on a variety of factors and those factors are the only things that should be considered—not what other couples did or spent.”

"The Wedding Industry’s Pricey Little Secret" shows why median could be a much more accurate number. For example, according to the article, in Manhattan the widely reported average is $76,687, whereas the median is $55,104. And in Alaska, the average is $15,504, yet the median is a mere $8,440.

The actual median is probably even lower: often, studies survey the upper economic scale of weddings, and only include the subset of couples who sign up for wedding websites and respond to online surveys. In other words, the sample is skewed and not a true sample of to-be-wed or newlywed couples.

All this is why i will now rely on theweddingreport.com for different figures. And i apologise for spreading the "average" around in the past.

INFOGRAPHIC: Dirty. Streaming. Cheaters. On Netflix?

Do you watch new TV episodes without your partner, even though you promised you wouldn't? You're not alone. Check this Netflix study!

From Netflix, via research conducted by Harris Interactive.

• Among those in a relationship who would stream cheat, the highest percentage said they would be likely do so at home by themselves on the main TV (66%). Scandalously, 21% would watch in bed while their significant other was asleep and 5% said they would cheat in the bathroom.

• Perhaps to get out of sleeping on the couch, results showed that many would take some kind of action to either hide or face the fact that they watched a TV program via streaming before their significant other, of whom…

• 41% would not spoil scenes before they happened.

• 14% would feel so guilty that they would have to confess.

• 12% would re-watch and “fake it” with emotion. If there’s one thing that can lead to more trouble, it’s “faking it.”

WEDDING: Officiant at Marmivon in Los Angeles, CA

Congratulations Jen. & Jai!  It was an honour to officiate for this fun-loving, relaxed couple at this fantastic venue:

Asian Wedding Officiant in Los Angeles, CA. Photo by Herman Au

Big THANK YOU to Dana/Michael at Marmivon; Elsa, Melissa and their crew at ME Weddings & Events; Herman Au photographer (above) and Ken Shin Films videographer.

NEWS: Non-Believers Excluded from Boston Bombing Healing Memorial

Representation for Humanists and atheists was denied last week, at a government-endorsed memorial ceremony to honor lives lost in Boston. 

'Heal Our City' service in Boston. From WBUR.org. (Photo: Charles Krupa/AP)

Religion Dispatches online wrote about a Harvard University chaplain, a Humanist clergyperson near Boston, who was not included to participate in an interfaith memorial event “Healing Our City”. You can also read more from this press release from secular.org.

Today, the following was taken from an email/letter written today by Roy Speckhardt, Executive Director of the American Humanist Association (AHA):

"...When a request was made for inclusion of a humanist representative at the interfaith service attended by President Obama last week in the wake of the Boston bombings, the request was repeatedly denied. In response, the American Humanist Association has joined with other organizations in the community of reason in asking its members to submit a letter outlining their personal feelings about this. 

"Letters can be sent to BostonResponse@gmail.com. Responses will be collected and sent to those responsible for excluding representation from nontheistic groups. It’s important to remember that such exclusion occurred despite the fact that nearly 50% of the people in the Boston area describe themselves as not religious. 

"There was—we are happy to report—a secular memorial service organized by Humanist Community at Harvard this week. But this doesn’t correct the insulting nature of the government-endorsed event that purposely excluded nonreligious Americans during a time when community bonding and healing is most needed."

For more information, please see the AHA's Action Alert page, "Don't Exclude Humanists from Community Memorials".